As a senior high school repeater, in the recent month, I was deeply in anxiety, boredom and even frustration, and sometimes I felt that my sanity was teetering on the edge.
Every time I was faced with the task of studying, my first reaction was to avoid it, and I kept questioning myself internally why I chose to repeat the course, filled with regret.
The pressure was mounting, like an invisible weight weighing me down, causing my attitude towards those around me to deteriorate, I couldn't move without losing my temper, and I just wanted to get away from it all.
All day long, my mind is foggy, my thoughts are as disorganized as a jumble, and I'm cripplingly inefficient.
Persistent low mood and lack of motivation to do anything.
I also had a big fight with my mom today over a small matter and said a lot of impulsive and hurtful things that I was especially sorry for afterwards.
Hi friend! Let me start by giving you a big hug across the room and kudos to you for your clear awareness of your emotions, because awareness is the first step to change oh so much.
In fact, behind the avoidance often hides a lack of confidence in yourself. You may be worried that you will not do well after repeating the course, and so you avoid the possible feeling of failure, anxiety and loss by not trying hard enough.
When these emotions aren't dealt with properly, it's easy to project them onto those close to you and ease the inner turmoil by picking fights or arguing, but this hurts the relationship instead.
Try keeping an emotional diary. Recording your feelings in writing in the moment can help you become more aware of and sort through your emotions, and learn to face your needs honestly instead of hurting yourself and others with emotional expressions.
Once you see the need behind your emotions, you can be brave enough to talk to your family or friends about your true inner feelings and seek emotional support, they will give you strength.
I'm Lilly the Answer House Little Ears, the world and I love you all the time, go for it!