I am divorced and living alone with my son.
The boyfriend I have now always complains that I spend too much time with the kids and we fight about it all the time.
But I think it's very important to be there for my child, after all, I'm the only mom he's got, and it's all the more important for me to care for him more.
He even said something like "I'm not allowed to spend time with the kids as long as he's around."
He is divorced himself and has a newborn daughter who lives with his ex-wife.
He said that when he sees my son he thinks of his own daughter and feels guilty for not being there for her.
I don't know what to do with this relationship, I'm conflicted, are we not right for each other?
Hello friend! I'll start by giving you a warm hug when I see the confusion you're facing.
You do have a tough problem right now, so let me give you another heartwarming encouragement from across the screen.
What you need to do now is learn subject separation.
Because there are only three things in the world: your own business, other people's business, and God's business.
This idea comes from the book, The Turn of a Mind.
Your boyfriend thinks you spend too much time with your kids, but you're not wrong; you're the only mom your kids have, so of course they need your company.
Your boyfriend could have actually chosen to be there for his daughter, but he didn't; he couldn't prevent you from having contact with your son. Why should he?
Maybe he's trying to control you, so he's using your son as an excuse.
If he truly loves you, he will support you spending more time with your son, after all, you are a single mom.
The very act of him completely preventing you from spending time with your son while you are with him is wrong; maybe you should really think seriously about whether you are right for each other.
I sincerely hope that your current problem will be solved soon.
That's all I can think of at the moment.
I hope my answer is helpful and inspiring. I am the answerer learning well everyday.
In, the world and I love you. Good luck!