My boyfriend and I broke up, mainly because I have a bit of low self-esteem, insecurity, and always suffer, which creates distance and mistrust between us. It was very unpleasant to get along with each other, and we couldn't feel each other's love and trust. Now I regret so much, I always think that if I could trust him a little more, be true to myself, not so afraid and inferiority complex, it would be good. I always feel like I'm the one who missed out on someone special, but he doesn't think we're right for each other and has no intention of getting back together. But I want to tell him that I'll change, I'll try to make our relationship better, I want to be with him. But he already doesn't want to get back together, and I can't let go, and I often regret that I didn't do a good job in my relationship. What should I do?
Hello, Mr. Owner, I'm Whale Social Worker Xiao Bei.
First of all, I'd like to give you a warm hug and can very much understand how you feel. From your description, I can see that you broke up with your boyfriend, but you still keep feeling guilty that you didn't do well in the relationship. This is actually quite common and often related to our childhood experiences. It looks like you have an anxious attachment style, which is a tendency to lack trust in your partner.
In fact, some surveys show that there are thousands of people in this world who are suitable for you. So it doesn't matter if you fail in this relationship, there are many others waiting for you. This experience is like a small test, let us see our own problems in the relationship. Why don't we think of this relationship as a final exam, where we find our shortcomings and can correct them slowly. At least we have the experience so we can avoid the same mistakes the next time we fall in love.
Good luck~ (whale social worker 🐳)
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