Lately, I feel like everything is making me so miserable and anxious.
Thinking back to high school, I have always been very good at school, can be said to be the level of the school bully, never fell in the study. I am quite proud of my character, but because I was raised in a greenhouse, I am a bit naive. If I keep this state, surely I can easily get into 985 or 211 universities.
But a boy came along and almost ruined my life. He started the second semester of my sophomore year of high school and was clearly showing a crush on me. I'd never experienced anything like that before and assumed that was what it was, so I slowly fell for him as well (honestly, if he hadn't initiated it, I never would have moved on).
One day, because he suddenly gave me the cold shoulder (probably because of my family of origin, I have a pleasing personality), I got up the courage to write him a love letter. He tore it up directly after reading it and wrote back that he didn't like me and that he liked another girl. I was especially aggravated and thought it was just him being angry.
What made it even harder was that in the year and a half between sophomore year and senior year, he continued to pay excessive attention to me while at the same time liking another girl. My mind was completely broken because by that time I already had a crush on him. This duplicity on his part made me feel like I wasn't good enough or pretty enough, so I became inferior and humble, and my academic performance fell through the floor. The ridicule and blows from people around me destroyed my self-esteem even more, and it was as if I had become another person, and I ended up failing the college entrance exams.
A big hug to you first, dear friend!
First of all kudos to you, you have realized your problem and are actively looking for a solution.
You're such a brave girl.
Let me talk to you and together we can get out of the mess we're in right now.
1. Courageously face the blows of the past and take the responsibility of growth on your own shoulders.
I know that the frustration and low self-esteem that boy brought to you even affected the entrance exams.
This feeling really makes it so hard.
Who hasn't experienced dating troubles when they were young?
Especially since he misled you and trifled with you, and did you so much harm.
We can't control who or what we'll encounter, but now that we're older, we can look at the experience afresh.
Remember, honey, it's normal for us all to be prone to low self-esteem when it comes to people we like.
But when he makes it clear that he has no desire to go further, be brave and let it go.
This is an important lesson in life.
This lesson comes a little early for you, before you're ready.
But that's okay.
Once we realize the problem, we can face it again.
The fact that he doesn't like you enough just means that you're not right for each other, and it has nothing to do with whether or not you're pretty or nice.
The kind of person you are is defined by you.
Of course, it's not easy to do that, but since you want to face it, it is what it is.
Even the best girls fall out of love.
So this is an opportunity for us to grow quickly.
"In a person's life, bad things always happen whether they want them to or not."
What we can do is change the way we respond to bad things.
Don't doubt and deny yourself because of setbacks.
From this moment on, stop complaining about anyone and take responsibility for your own growth.
2. Improve your resilience.
I can empathize with your loss and resentment and understand your pain.
These reactions are normal.
Hug yourself first and care for yourself more.
When you're in this predicament, you definitely want someone to pull you through.
Actually. 
But we're willing to stay with you!
The focus is on building your resilience.
Resilience is a book I recommend as well.
Resilience is an important ability we have in the face of adversity.
It helps you get out of all kinds of bad situations.
Like accepting yourself and stopping self-denial.
Give yourself more positive feedback, for example, although you failed this time, you have a good foundation and ability to learn, and you will be able to regain your self-confidence if you slowly move on from the pain.
Once upon a time you were a hothouse flower, now you'll be stronger through the wind and rain.
In that sense, every setback teaches us to grow.
"Once a person fails, it is easy to fall into an inferiority complex from which he cannot extricate himself.
It may even risk a collapse of self-worth."
So be more considerate of yourself.
3. Learn to love and affirm yourself.
When self-doubt sets in, tell yourself that it's just thoughts.
We can do this without asking for recognition from the outside.
Affirm yourself more.
Try some ways to love yourself.
For example:
Be grateful for life., discover for yourself the joy in the small, ordinary things of everyday life.
Do more of what you're good atThe
Into Nature(math.) genusExperience being small under the sky and in front of the mountains to open your mind.
Give yourself time to heal slowly and trust your inner strength.
You don't have to please anyone anymore. Just be true to yourself.!
It's a long road of healing and discovery, and we'll be there for you!
Bless you!
The world and I love you!